Developing Resilience Through Positive Psychology
- Lauren Dyer
- Nov 19, 2024
- 3 min read

Resilience, often called “ordinary magic,” is the ability to adapt positively in the face of adversity. Whether dealing with a minor setback or a life-changing challenge, resilience enables us to recover, grow, and thrive. This article explores common misconceptions about resilience, key skills to develop it, and practical strategies for applying it in everyday life.
What Resilience Is – And What It Isn’t
Resilience is the capacity to adapt positively in the context of adversity. It allows individuals to recover from setbacks and move forward with strength and clarity. However, there are several myths about resilience that need to be debunked:
1. Resilient People Don’t Show Emotion
Resilience is not about suppressing emotions. In fact, emotional regulation is a key aspect of resilience. Being able to acknowledge and process emotions—whether positive or negative—helps us adapt more effectively.
2. Resilient People Act Alone
Resilience is not about independence. Research shows that social support is a critical factor in building resilience. Strong, supportive relationships provide a safety net during challenging times.
3. Resilient People Bounce Back Quickly
The process of resilience doesn’t have a set timeline. Sometimes, resilience involves taking the time to sit with uncertainty and process emotions gradually. Progress may be slow, but it is still progress.
Core Skills for Building Resilience
Resilience is not an innate trait; it is a set of skills that can be cultivated over time. Six empirically validated skills are fundamental to building resilience:
1. Emotional Awareness and Regulation
This involves recognising emotions as they arise and managing them constructively. It enables better responses to adversity and reduces the risk of being overwhelmed.
2. Flexible and Accurate Thinking
Resilient individuals assess situations objectively, avoiding thinking traps like overgeneralisation or personalisation. This skill helps maintain perspective and focus on actionable solutions.
3. Realistic Optimism
A balanced approach to optimism—focusing on what can be controlled while acknowledging reality—promotes persistence and hope.
4. Impulse Control
The ability to delay gratification and manage impulsive reactions is crucial for navigating challenges calmly and constructively.
5. Empathy and Connection
Resilience is strengthened by fostering meaningful relationships. Empathy enables better communication and support during difficult times.
6. Self-Efficacy
Believing in one’s ability to influence outcomes fosters confidence and motivates action. This sense of mastery encourages problem-solving and persistence.
Practical Strategies to Develop Resilience
Building resilience requires intentional effort and consistent practice. The following strategies can help develop the skills mentioned above:
1. Recognise and Challenge Thinking Traps
Thinking traps like mindreading, catastrophising, or tunnel vision can distort reality and drain resilience. Identifying and disputing these harmful thoughts fosters clarity and balance.
2. Use the ABC Model
The ABC model highlights how beliefs (B) influence emotional and behavioural consequences (C) after an activating event (A). Challenging inaccurate beliefs with evidence helps regulate emotions and responses.
3. Practice Real-Time Resilience
Techniques such as controlled breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and positive imagery can help manage stress and maintain focus during challenging moments.
4. Reach Out for Support
Building and maintaining strong social connections provides emotional support and broadens perspective. Sharing challenges with trusted individuals strengthens relationships and resilience.
5. Celebrate Progress
Recognising and celebrating small achievements reinforces self-efficacy and motivates continued effort toward resilience-building.
The Broader Impact of Resilience
Resilience not only benefits the individual but also has a ripple effect on relationships and communities. Emotions, whether positive or negative, are contagious. By fostering resilience, individuals can create a supportive environment that enhances collective well-being.
Moreover, resilience equips people to approach adversity with clarity and purpose, conserving energy for actions that lead to positive change. In moments of uncertainty or stress, resilience helps us navigate challenges while staying true to our goals and values.
Conclusion
Resilience is an invaluable skill that can be developed through intentional practice. By embracing emotions, challenging unhelpful thoughts, and building supportive relationships, individuals can adapt positively to adversity and thrive in life’s ever-changing circumstances. Cultivating resilience is not just about enduring challenges—it is about growing through them, fostering well-being, and unlocking the potential for a fulfilling and adaptive life
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